When it comes to mainstream music, my quest to find meaning in lyrics has proven futile. In general, mass media seems to discourage creativity, intellect and wit when it comes to producing meaningful messages and visual appeal.

Deconstructing music videos and lyrics has become one of my favorite pastimes. Critiques include badass women who emulate unappealing characteristics of male stereotypes such as Jessie J's "Do It Like a Dude" video to Lana Del Rey's song "Cola," sharing with the public that her vagina tastes like soda pop.

The opening line to "Cola" being: "My pussy tastes like Pepsi Cola."

As a fairly open-minded, radical friendly individual, the opening proclamation in "Cola" still catches me by surprise. The word 'pussy' isn't a term that is typically associated with strength or integrity. It is a pejorative term describing someone who is weak or cowardly.

Given I share the same female organ as Del Rey, I was personally insulted when she compares her vagina to that of a mass-produced bottle/can of fizzy high fructose corn syrup that leads to poor health. The song is said to have been inspired by her Scottish boyfriend. She sure has a winner on her hands.

Another flagrant media icon, Miley Cyrus, recently released "We Can't Stop" which has been a buzzing tune in mainstream pop culture. The song appears to incorporate deliberate, controversial racial and gendered messages.

One example being: Cyrus bends down shaking her bum with exclusively black women surrounding her and sings:

"To my home girls here with the big butt. Shaking it like we at a strip club. Remember only God can judge ya."

There are far more obscure depictions in the video, but the song's message is simply: We're young and we can do whatever we want. Yes, we get it Miley; you're no longer sweet Hannah Montana.

As a critic of popular culture, I continue to find the digital production of saturated absurdities a detriment to the progress of young people and humanity in general. And no, the catchy and trendy beats do not outweigh the prevailing asinine effects of celebrity icons on society. I've often been told not to take lyrics and visuals too seriously -- that it's all about making money.

The revenue model does not revolve around what the consumers actually want, but on what we think we want. It is widely acknowledged that companies purchase media airtime for their top artists -- sorry Beyonce fans, but the rest of the world doesn't actually want to hear the same song multiple times per hour. Rather than reconfiguring the industry to promote intelligible lyrics, authenticity, and egalitarian imagery, it continues to adhere to a herd mentality.

The media systems not only reduce the self-worth of its celebrity assets, but use them to construct the psyche of people, especially young people. Why is it difficult to find an intelligent, eccentric individual within mainstream pop culture? Is it because media companies would struggle to control and mold intelligent artists; who possibly have a greater understanding of how they impact others?

I dream of a day when mass media conveys deep emotions, features of egalitarianism, and positive depictions of sexuality. Before passing this off as an unrealistic vision, remember, they have to give the people what they want. Choose wisely.

Note: Do not read on if you haven't seen Season 8, Episode 3, of Showtime's "Dexter," titled "What's Eating Dexter Morgan?"

Oh, Deb. Poor Deb. It was an episode of "almosts" for Dexter's sister, who has now almost been completely destroyed by getting tangled up in her brother's web of serial-killing-serial-killers: She was almost arrested for a DUI; Volgel almost suggested Dexter kill her; Dexter and Deb almost made up over dinner; and then, Deb almost confessed to killing LaGuerta.

And it almost felt like too much. Jennifer Carpenter has been giving a great performance as "damaged Deb" this season, but it kind of felt like her character's roller-coaster ride of guilt and self-destruction reached rock bottom this week. The final season of "Dexter" has to move past Deb's downward spiral and her threatening to turn both herself and her brother in, right?

So let's break down this episode as we wonder why Dr. Vogel owns a gun, what Elway put in that mysterious hangover cure and what happened to that written confession Deb was working on.

The opening scene, where viewers were at first led to believe something terrible had happened to Harrison, was an adorable, manipulative, well-executed sight gag. It started with Harrison moaning in discomfort, then we saw what looked like blood leading to the bathroom and then ... the empty box of popsicles. But it also brought up the question of whether Harrison might grow up to become the next Dexter. He too was born in blood, and he has Dexter's genes. But for now, we can all agree that popsicles are delicious.

From there, the action jumped to Deb passed out in her car, surrounded by empty beer bottles, getting woken up by a cop knocking at the driver's side window. She cracked up at the sight of the parking meter she'd run over, but she called Quinn, and he got her out of it. Still, he's getting skeptical about what's going on with her. "At least when I was spinning out, I had a reason," he told her. "You turned down my proposoal ... that was my reason ... so what's yours?"

Miami Metro's investigation into The Brain Surgeon hit a dead end when they found Lyle Sussman's dead body at his cabin, taken off the hook he was impaled on and made to look like a shotgun blast suicide. So case closed, guys. But who took Sussman's body off that hook and set up the crime scene? It wasn't Dexter, the usual suspect in this type of evidence manipulation. Could it have been Dr. Vogel? Masuka? The real Brain Surgeon? At this point, who knows.

What we do know is that The Brain Surgeon knows Vogel and Dexter are onto him or her. (S)he sent Vogel another mysterious text, telling her to "look outside" where she found two more gift-wrapped brain bits, marked His & Hers. But they weren't just any brain bits -- these brain bits were from the occipital lobe, the part of the brain apparently responsible for vision. In other words, he's been watching them.

Meanwhile, from cross-referencing Vogel's book and her former patients, Dexter found a possible Brain Surgeon suspect: Ron Galuzzo. He strangled his best friend in high school, but convinced Vogel he was a bully. Eventually, she figured out the truth and got him institutionalized until he was 21. Dexter eventually stalked him at his job and searched his apartment, where he discovered Galuzzo was a serial-killing cannibal, but alas, not the Brain Surgeon he was looking for. But he killed him anyway just for kicks.

Dexter also told Vogel about Deb's struggles, and why she's acting out, including the understatement of the century. "Suffice it to say, she's not handling it well."

And then, Dr. Vogel got creepy, because she doesn't like not having Dexter's complete attention. "So my question is this: When your sister found out about who you were and what you were doing, why didn't you kill her?" Vogel asked. "Not that I'd ever advocate such a thing." No, of course not! She would never advocate such a thing. But she would imply it.

Vogel also wasn't buying that Dexter loves Deb like a sister because psychopaths "can't love" like a normal person. And she told him that he's perfect again. "All this talk about Deb and loving her, is like you're Michaelangelo trying to play the banjo."

Later, we learned that Vogel owns a gun, an interesting point to note for those speculating that she might be the killer herself.

But back to Deb and Dexter, because that's what this episode was really about. Dexter came into Elway's office to confront Deb about her almost-DUI, and got her to agree to go to dinner with him so they could talk some things out. (A few minutes earlier, Elway had given Deb a mysterious hangover cure with some pills disolved in it, another interesting note for those commenters who think he is somehow up to no good.)

Deb and Dexter's dinner almost looked promising. Dexter showed her a guy she saved in a shootout having dinner with his family. He tried to convince her she's a good person. And she finally seemed to let her guard down.

But soon enough, her guilt crept back in, and she showed up at the police station wasted, slurring to Quinn, "I wanna make an official statement.

"I don't want coffee, I want to confess," she continued, before whispering, "I killed LaGuerta" into his ear. He discretely dragged her into an interrogation room and turned off the mic. But he didn't get that Deb was actually confessing to the murder. He told her to write down everything from that night on a yellow legal pad, while he called Dexter to clean up the mess.

Dexter, with Vogel in tow, raced back to Miami Metro, and tag-teamed the situation when they arrived. Vogel told Quinn that Deb was suffering from a mix of survivor's guilt and post-traumatic stress disorder, and when Deb screamed that, "I'm confessing everything ... the whole fucking truth ... there's nothing you can do to stop me!" Dexter jabbed one of his knockout shots into her neck. As Dexter dragged her out of the station, Vogel grabbed the legal pad Deb was writing her confession down on.

When they got Deb back to her apartment, Dexter handcuffed her to the couch and left her passed out with Dr. Vogel so he could run off and kill Galuzzo. This seemed like a really bad idea, considering Vogel kind of wants Deb dead.

And lo and behold, Vogel creepily looked at Deb's pills, either contemplating giving her an overdose or just being a good doctor, depending on what you think of her intentions.

I just hope that whenever Deb wakes up, she and Vogel have a really productive therapy session. Because damaged Deb is getting to be a little bit of a drag.

"Dexter" airs Sunday nights at 9 p.m. ET on Showtime.

What did you think of this latest episode of "Dexter"? Leave your thoughts and theories in the comments.

Note: Do not read on if you have not yet seen Season 5, Episode 7 of Bravo's "Real Housewives Of New Jersey," titled "When Joes Collide."

"We got a stripper in the house!" Joe Gorga yells while his wife convulses and his youngest son booty pops his diaper just like on "Incontinent Toddlers Gone Wild." Apparently, this is a typical "going away" ritual for the Gorga family, which makes me really worry about what's going to happen when they get back. Now that they're all danced out, Joe and Melissa can pack, and their children can rock quietly in separate corners

"I don't even know why the hell we're going on this thing," Rich says as he and Kathy pack the matching Louis Vuitton luggage that's about as real as their healthy, happy sex life. When Rich asks what time the "party bus" is getting there, I assumed it was a silly joke juxtaposing the excitement of a party bus with the misery of going on a retreat with people you'd rather skin and wear as a coat than hang out with. I was wrong.

In the next scene, a massive bus backs into the driveway, and they also acquire Rosie. Melissa comes out with tons of luggage, and we get a look at just how much junk there is in the trunk. Oh, and also they put the bags into the bus' undercarriage.

On the bus, Kathy and Rosie try to talk the skeptics into the trip. Apparently, they will all be in good hands because Dr. V., an expert in relationships that Teresa knows, will be guiding them on a path toward love, respect and not dedicating every waking moment of their lives to ruining someone else's. "Dr. Va-jay-jay?" Melissa shrieks, proving just how mature and dedicated she is to all the above. As an aside, I'd just like to say that I think people really need to stop letting "va-jay-jay" happen. It got its 15 minutes of fame on "Grey's Anatomy" and the cover of every Cosmo magazine. It's time to think of a more creative way to refer to lady giblets. (I don't suggest that one.)

"We're wasting our time again," Joe Gorga says, exasperated. "Joe, to me, is a fake," he continues. "He doesn't love her. He's a cheater. He's an a**hole," Melissa says quietly, as if a mic can't pick up a whisper. She goes on to explain that Teresa's real anger toward her stems from how jealous she is of Melissa and Joe's relationship. Since she's "not embraced" by her husband, she doesn't want anyone to be. Granted, we see a heavily edited version of the housewives' lives and should take much of what goes on with a grain of Xanax -- but since Joe called Teresa a see-you-next-Tuesday at the winery, I have to admit I'm buying what Melissa's selling. (All in $1 bills, just the way she likes.)

Eventually Teresa and Joe arrive at Sun Castle resort in Lake George. It's gorgeous, albeit a little creepy. It's got a certain je ne sais quoi, not unlike the Overlook Hotel ... and the housewives are about to make RED RUM sound like a delish brunch cocktail.

In keeping with the "rural royalty" theme, Caroline and Albert are currently at Lambert Castle, a structure in New Jersey run by former "American Idol" runner-up Adam Lambert. It seems like a truly lovely building, if you can get past the eyeliner. Caroline has decided to skip the retreat, and instead, has suited up in a massively over-sized brown coat that I think was once featured in a Jenny Craig "Before" photo shoot. (The "after" was a nice, slim windbreaker that lost a full Jennifer Hudson.) They have a lovely time at the park, and I quickly realize something that makes me very sad: I'm officially a reality show violence convert. I used to love the sweet, "Everyday man and woman" bits when the ladies weren't tearing each other limb-from-limb ... but now, I find them boring, and wonder whether they are worth noting in recaps. What fresh hell is this?!

Oh, and by the way, the Manzo splendor in the grass culminates in Caroline asking Albert to take more time with the family, and Albert saying that he wants to, but it's not so easy when you're the breadwinner. Caroline explains that he works feverishly because he lost his father at a very young age, and in some way, it's how he makes him posthumously proud. Blah blah blah, no yelling or internal bleeding, get your tickets to Yawn Fest 2013 right here, before nobody else does.

As the fiesta wagon pulls up, Teresa and Joe awkwardly welcome them inside. After an elaborate line of air kisses, Teresa looks around and inquires about Caroline and Jacqueline. Kathy breaks the silence that ensues, explaining that they aren't coming. She mentions that Jacqueline is having a "hard time with Nick," which Teresa doesn't buy. She brings up the nasty tweet and asks how Jacqueline had time for that, as if sitting at a computer and dashing out 140 characters is time consuming, and in any way comparable to a weekend away from home.

With that, Teresa quickly brushes her anger under the rug and whips out her welcome mat. She shows the gang to their respective rooms (consensus: they are all too hot) and lets everyone settle in and talk about each other. Teresa switches emotions so quickly that it's a wonder she doesn't get whip lash. Joe Giudice, however, is as quiet as snow falling on cedar-scented insane people ... until he isn't.

What follows is Joe Giudice's medical opinion about Jacqueline's son and autism: "A lot of people have autism. Autism isn't really a bad disease. Some of 'em are like scientists!" Though Teresa only has half a brain cell more than her husband (Brendan Fraser owes them his career -- they were the people on which "Encino Man" was based, right?) even she knows not to go down this road. She goes silent, although she is careful to mention in her interview that the inane things Joe says are often in defense of her/come from a good place.

As they sit down to lunch, Teresa announces, "My brother is the king-- the king of the castle!" He's at the head of the table so it makes sense, but it's still kinda weird. You know that split-second just as you're waking up where you're free from the troubles of your life? When it comes to her brother, Teresa seems to go there quite often. In those brief moments, it's like their sibling battle royale doesn't exist. Everyone eats in awkward silence.

Joe Giudice decides to share some important feelings of his own: He was making very loud farts upstairs, and he hoped that everyone heard them.

With that, there's a sound -- and it's not coming from Joe Giudice's GI tract. It's the perky husband-and-wife team builders, Stephanie and Steve. They look like the couple that every housewife would have made fun of in high school ... so that's one step toward unity, at least.

If you didn't watch (and bless you for reading this!), the only way I can explain S and S is that they look like people who play Monopoly and like it. "What are they going to fix us with?" Melissa muses. "Butterflies and sweet dreams?"

"It should be a great afternoon!" Steve says, cheerfully masking the fact that he has most certainly not gotten laid in four to five years.

As they lay a rope out on the floor, Rich and Rosie look on, mesmerized. "They went to SCHOOL for this," Rosie says. "They read BOOKS!" Rich echoes. Meanwhile, you just know good ol' Steve has giddy fantasies of going all Christian Grey on his wife if he can ever get her to untuck those boots from her khakis.

As everyone rolls their eyes, Steve makes them stand on a square of cloth inside the rope -- without touching the ground. It's like Twister for people with trust issues. Eventually they take squares away so that everyone has to jump onto the same one and molest each other. You know Steve's saying: Families that act like sexual predators together, stay together!

Then, Melissa looked through the TV and into my soul: "I think Joe Giudice is so into these games because his brain could understand the content."

Steve reminds them that it will be the moments when he and Stephanie are away, definitely not getting physical, that will really matter. The gang can easily figure out how to get through a fast game, but they must learn how to hold on to each other in life.

"You're looking at loyalty. I'm here," Joe Gorga says. "We're both here," Teresa corrects him before bringing up Jacqueline. When Melissa tries to join the conversation, Teresa snaps at her. Now everyone's talking over each other, and poor Steve can't get a word in edgewise. "If we're going to fix this, everyone needs to take a little bit of blame," Melissa says in her interview. "But she sent the message that ... this has nothing to do with her."

The camera pans across the snowy landscape to quickly remind you that, contrary to everything you're about to see, beauty exists in the world.

"You are poison!" Melissa shouts while doing a sort of bend-and-snap movement, minus the bend. I guess she basically just snaps -- literally and figuratively.

"You should stick with your sister!" Teresa yells back, fixated on her brother while Melissa leans against the window and shoots daggers into her hair. Oh, silly ol' Melissa -- haven't you realized that nothing can penetrate that furry helmet? God's weapons specialist/hairdresser spent a little more time on her. As Teresa screams, we cut to her interview. "Certain things he's saying to me, it's not coming from him. It's Melissa chirping in his ear."

We may never know if Melissa truly manipulated her husband behind closed doors (isn't smart a prerequisite to cunning?), but one thing's for sure: Whoever trained him to hate has been ratcheting up the lessons. "You're scum!" he spits at Teresa. The impact of the painful slur makes her physically recoil. It's like she took all nine letters directly to the chest and her new boobies (I think of them as Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen's squishier Jersey alter-egos) moved out of the way and let 'em hit.

Mortally wounded now, Teresa storms out of the room. In a bit of foreshadowing (if you consider "foreshadowing" something someone says about two seconds before they do it), Teresa's husband is outside with Rosie, telling her how he's so ready to "flip out" on his brother-in-law.

"He just called me scum!" Teresa shrieks. "I want to go!" With that, Joe predictably flips out and starts to barrel toward the door. Though this seems to be the reaction Teresa was looking for just a moment ago, she immediately tells him not to go inside. "Relax! I'm going to tell him to apologize," Joe says as he rushes in. Apparently, when Joe learned English, someone explained that "apologize" means "attempt to beat the snot out of someone."

Back inside, Joe Giudice doesn't have time to maybe kill Joe Gorga, 'cause Joe Gorga's already called dibs on violence.

He throws all two feet of his body at Giudice, and they're officially in the shortest fight ever. Don't get me wrong, it lasts a pretty decent amount of time ... I just mean it's like watching champs at the International Stunted Growth Invitational flail their T-Rex arms about with gusto.

With that, the screen goes black -- and Steve and Stephanie realize in a surge of adrenaline and passion that this is exactly what their relationship has been missing.

Has this episode changed your mind about any of our deranged friends? Let's talk it out in the comments.

"Real Housewives of New Jersey" airs Sundays at 8 p.m. ET on Bravo.

Look at that. A big truth actually came out during the second "Shunning Truth" reunion special for "Breaking Amish: Brave New World." Abe's brother, Andrew, admitted that he and Rebecca had slept together, putting to rest those long-standing rumors.

“It was before Abe and them got together," he explained. "If I’d known the two of them was gonna get together, I would never have done it.”

Andrew said that they'd both been drinking -- Rebecca corroborated this -- and that it was a long time ago. He also said that he regretted it. In fact, he seemed to be more broken up about it than his brother. Abe said he felt fine about everything.

But while this admission solves one rumor, it adds more layers to another bit of speculation. There's long been talk that Andrew may be the father of Rebecca's daughter. Neither Rebecca nor Abe has ever revealed who the girls' father is.

That wasn't the only bit of news that Andrew had to share, though. He revealed that he'll be on the cast of the new spinoff show, "Breaking Amish: LA," which premieres next Sunday at 10 p.m. ET on TLC.

TV Replay scours the vast television landscape to find the most interesting, amusing, and, on a good day, amazing moments, and delivers them right to your browser.

Note: Do not read on if you have not yet seen Season 6, Episode 5 of HBO's "True Blood," titled "F*** the Pain Away."

Human lives are pathetically brief, Pam tells the good therapist at the research camp. Lucky for us, the writers this season aren't wasting any of our time and I have to say, it's rather refreshing.

Two points for vampires and fairies this time around, who actually have conflicting emotions. Humans, we find, are complete jerks. To wit: Sarah Newlin gets her feelings hurt by the governor, who would rather mourn his daughter than unwrap her out of a bustier and make bigoted, blonde babies. She goes to Jason's house and takes advantage of his need to feel overtly heterosexual as a rebound. But Jess busts in after she's massacred Andy's fairy babies. Jess is torn up. Poor little vamp doesn't know if she's a demon whore or not. Lady Newlin barks some bible verse at her just before she calls in the LAVTF to take her to the camps ...

Which is sort of a good thing, since Eric and Tara were picked up, too. We're one step closer to watching the vamps crowd into that white room from Bill's future Lilith dream. About that room -- there's some sick stuff going on in there. The humans just really want to study them. So Pam, who must be sick of watered down Tru-Blood by now, gets to open up to a therapist about her maker in return for living donor blood. Steve Newlin provided the intel to lock her down and now both Eric and Pam are prisoners Numero Uno. Literally, that's their collective prisoner number. Which makes me wonder why Steve Newlin is Number 4. But let's not get caught up in a numbers game. Pam and Eric now have to fight to the death in a padded room while the governor watches as revenge for turning Willa. What's with television governors and their need to pit loved ones against each other? It was very Woodbury, Daryl versus Merle ... in case you missed it, but a good cliffhanger none the less.

More bad human behavior: Ben tells Sookie that her parents were trying to kill her that fateful night on the bridge. She gets Lafayette to put down the Henny for an hour and hold a seance to get in touch with her parents. And it turns out, Ben was right! We've been watching flashbacks of this car crash for years and we finally get to see where it all started. When Ben, as Warlow, went to make good on the Stackhouse contract, Sookie's dad was so scared, he just put her in the trunk to kill her before the vampire could make her immortal. Lafayette is now possessed by Sookie's dad and proceeds to try to drown Sookie since Ben-low is back and trying to get her on his side. Grown ups do the darndest things.

So, basically, all of our favorite characters are almost dead. Speaking of the long sleep and flashbacks, we got a super drawn out one to explain Ben-low and Bill. It goes like this: Caveman Ben was out fetching water back in 3500 B.C. when Lilith smelt his sweet faie-ness. They do it, then Lilith bites him. He goes back four years later and massacres his village, leaving Niall behind. Hating himself, he kills Lilith in a cave. But not really because she's back in Bill's body. In any case, right now in Bon Temps, Bill has Ben all locked up, whining about how he wants vampires to just be extinct already. He needs to talk to the Newlins.

The only humans too dumb to be bad are Andy, Jason and Merlotte bar-flies.

Andy revives one of his daughters with V and brings her to Holly's house, where he gets talked out of standing his ground with Vampire Bill. Go, Holly!

Jason goes to enlist in the LAVTF to make it right with Jess, meaning we have some action scenes inside the camp to look forward to.

Terry asks his old marine buddy Justin to kill him since he can't live with Arlene or himself after last season. Like a good friend, Justin agrees to do it for free. Score.

Alcide's looking for Sam, but Sam is trying to talk the VUS girl out of hating herself for sleeping with him, while entirely ignoring Emma and the fact that J.D. is just down the hall.

Truebies, I think I might have made a whole recap without misspelling a name. Someone get Jason a smartphone and tell him to meet me at Unfriendly Possum.

"True Blood" airs Sundays at 9 p.m. ET on HBO.

Joe Guidice put his foot in his mouth again on the latest installment of "The Real Housewives of New Jersey." He was discussing Nicholas, the son of castmembers Jacqueline and Chris, who has autism. He said that both Jacqueline and Chris use Nicholas as an "excuse."

“A lot of people have autism. I mean, autism isn’t really a bad disease -- some of them are like, scientists," Joe said. Teresa shut her husband up, and tried to defend him in a confessional later.

“I know my husband, and he doesn’t have one mean bone in his body, he just knows I’m really hurt by what Jacqueline did to me," she said.

Nicholas has lost much of his ability to speak as a result of his autism. Jacqueline and Chris have both spoken passionately on camera about their difficulties in coping with it.

The Stir was very harsh with Joe, calling him "loathsome" for his comments. The Hollywood Gossip believes that his words come from a place of ignorance, but that doesn't make it okay. They wrote, "Some say ignorance is bliss. I say it's frightening.”

While acknowledging that Teresa was defending her husband, saying that he was just trying to support her, The Huffington Post says that neither of them came out of the moment looking great. They wrote, "Brendan Fraser owes them his career -- they were the people on which ‘Encino Man’ was based, right?”.

Catch new episodes of "The Real Housewives of New Jersey" every Sunday at 8 p.m. ET on Bravo.

TV Replay scours the vast television landscape to find the most interesting, amusing, and, on a good day, amazing moments, and delivers them right to your browser.

Andy Dick continued his attempts to reform his public image by appearing on "Celebrity Wife Swap." The mother of his child, Lina, swapped places with Lorenzo Lamas' wife, Shawna. And while it proved a positive and eye-opening experience for the women, it was perhaps even more important for the men.

At the group meeting that closes the hour, Andy called out the fact that Shawna doesn't attend red carpet events with her husband. She said that she doesn't want to be associated with Lorenzo's womanizer image. While talking about it, Lorenzo started to tear up, which got Andy emotional as well.

“I didn’t know it was something that would hurt him I guess," Shawna admitted.

“Well, he wouldn’t say it," Andy said. After their discussion, Shawna said that she plans to walk a red carpet with Lorenzo at an upcoming event.

Lorenzo told TV Guide that he was apprehensive about his wife being with Andy because of his past legal troubles. It was Andy's time on "Dancing With the Stars" that changed Lorenzo's mind. Andy said that with both shows he's hoping people will see a different side of him -- that he's not just trouble.

See more celebrities switching up their lives on "Wife Swap," Sundays at 8 p.m. ET on ABC.

TV Replay scours the vast television landscape to find the most interesting, amusing, and, on a good day, amazing moments, and delivers them right to your browser.

The racism has become so dominant in the "Big Brother" house that CBS aired a disclaimer -- which Variety called "unprecedented" -- about it at the opening of the latest episode. In part, the disclaimer read: "At times, the Houseguests may reveal prejudices and other beliefs that CBS does not condone. Views or opinions expressed by a Houseguest are those of the individuals speaking and do not represent the views or opinions of CBS."

That was the first clue that the network was going to dive fully into exploring at least some of the racism that has sparked national headlines so far this summer. One again, Aaryn found herself at the center of the controversy -- and yet she remains convinced that she's never said anything racist -- after she attacked Candice.

First, she flipped Candice's mattress against the wall, and then she started doing a "ghetto voice" when Candice got upset about the bed. It was an incredibly hostile situation that was escalating until Howard literally picked Candice up and removed her from the room. He then talked her down, while dealing with his own rage at the blatant racism. He acknowledge that it was an unfair situation, and an intolerable one, but their best move was to keep their cool. No matter how hard it was at times.

Aaryn did apologize to Candice during the broadcast, which Candice accepted. At least, she accepted it to Aaryn's face. In a confessional, she said that she didn't believe it. Still, HitFix admired Candice for this move, seeing it as gameplay. "I hadn't felt Candice was much of a competitor, but if she can do this, she's got game," they wrote.

RealityRewind thinks Aaryn and her cohort GinaMarie -- who's thrown some racist slings of her own -- are delusional. They wrote, "It is insane how these girls think they are doing nothing wrong! ... Who thinks that way? What world is [Aaryn] living in?"

Aaryn and her crew were especially heinous because Helen -- also a minority who's been disparaged -- won HOH. When it came time to pick her nominations for the week, she put up Aaryn and Kaitlin. The third nominee will be chosen by the person who wins MVP.

The controversy -- and outrage -- continues on "Big Brother," Sundays and Wednesdays at 8 p.m. ET and Thursdays at 9 p.m. ET on CBS.

TV Replay scours the vast television landscape to find the most interesting, amusing, and, on a good day, amazing moments, and delivers them right to your browser.

On the season premiere of "Tia & Tamera," the sisters had a relaxing time at the spa. They even got steams ... for their lady parts. They're called V-Steams, which is supposed to help hormone balance and circulation. The treatment has its own special chair that situates the women to get hit with herbs and steam in the right area.

“It feels like someone is doing this on your va-jay-jay," Tia said, breathing heavily.

Tamera's comparison was perhaps more graphic, but also more disturbing. She said it "feels like you’re taking a dump outside in Louisiana.”

Still, Tia said the steam treatments have improved her sex life with her husband. According to the LA Times, these kinds of treatments have been around for centuries in Korea. There's one spa in Santa Monica that offers V-Steams specifically to help women with infertility issues.

But does it really work for any of these things? A gynecologist wrote for BlogHer and said there was no way of knowing scientifically. The process hasn't gone through any clinical trials, but that doesn't mean it does any harm, either. In other words, have a steam if you want!

You never know what "Tia & Tamera" will get up to next, Sundays at 8 p.m. ET on Style.

TV Replay scours the vast television landscape to find the most interesting, amusing, and, on a good day, amazing moments, and delivers them right to your browser.

Marisol's investigation into the death of Flora came up with some juicy evidence on "Devious Maids" this week. She found a pregnancy test in Flora's room. While the other maids seemed reluctant to open up to her about Flora, Rosie finally cracked and confirmed it. She said that it was part of Flora's plan.

“That’s what she wanted," Rosie said. "To have a millionaire’s baby.”

Marisol hit a temporary roadblock, though, when the coroner's report came back saying that Flora was not pregnant at the time of her death. But the eagle-eyed Marisol noticed that the coroner's report had been changed. Then, in a stroke of luck, she recognized him at the police station. He was a friend of Adrian's, making Adrian look even more guilty.

While the investigation into Flora's death continues, Zap2It points out that “just because she's dead doesn't mean she was good. Flora had told the other maids that she was going to get pregnant by a millionaire, then her plan was to bleed him for money, so she was the original devious maid.”

The next mystery to solve is who's the father of Flora's baby? Is it the same person who killed her, or had her killed? TV Fanatic is loving the deepening mystery. "I am so thankful that Marc Cherry’s incredible and creative work is back on our television screens. I can’t wait until next Sunday," they wrote.

Secrets will be revealed on "Devious Maids," Sundays at 10 p.m. ET on Lifetime.

TV Replay scours the vast television landscape to find the most interesting, amusing, and, on a good day, amazing moments, and delivers them right to your browser.

The season finale of "The Wanted Life" saw the band check in on Nathan Sykes after the surgery he had on his vocal cords. It was an emotional reunion for the band, who'd faced the possibility of the end of The Wanted as they knew it. If Nathan didn't come out of the surgery with success, he'd have to withdraw from the popular group.

“It’s definitely a reminder that fame comes really quickly and it can go away just as fast," said bandmate Jay McGuiness.

Luckily, it was good news for Nathan and the group. The surgery was a success and helped him with his vocal cord issues. Nathan is now performing with the band again.

Max George said cheers to Nathan on Twitter, and looked forward to a great future. The Wanted teased a bit of that future at the end of the episode, dropping a preview of their new single, “We Own the Night,” They reported that they'll shoot the music video for the track soon.

The group talked to MTV after the season about what it was like filming a reality show. They agreed that it was a positive experience for them. It did change the group, but for the better. They said, "It was kind of a glorified counseling session ... It really brought us closer together because it showed that we cared more."

TV Replay scours the vast television landscape to find the most interesting, amusing, and, on a good day, amazing moments, and delivers them right to your browser.

Catherine Bach had the perfect life. And then, the unthinkable happened. On April 30, 2010, her beloved husband of 20 years, entertainment lawyer Peter Lopez, committed suicide, and life, as she knew it, changed forever.

Bach, who played the sexy, sassy Daisy Duke on the CBS action adventure TV show The Dukes of Hazzard from 1979 to 1885, spends her time these days portraying Chelsea's mother, Anita Lawson, on The Young and the Restless as well as overseeing her Catherine Bach Signature Line of jewelry and participating in Dukes Fan Fairs where she signs autographs for thousands of fans with fellow castmates John Schneider, Tom Wopat, Rick Hurst, Sonny Shroyer, James Best and Ben Jones -- and, most importantly, she takes great care of her precious teenage daughters, Laura and Sophia.

Bach has not spoken of her husband's suicide in depth until now. She graciously sat down with The Huffington Post to talk about the heart-breaking circumstances that took place before and after the day Lopez took his own life, leaving her with more questions than answers three years later. She has a therapeutic message for those who have had to deal with suicide or the sudden death of a loved one.

Thank you for talking with us about your husband's suicide. Suicide is such a very delicate subject. I'm sure you will help a lot of people by sharing your story because it affects so many lives. I read that Peter took his life on April 30, 2010 so walk us through that day. What happened?

Let me preface this suicide by saying that every suicide is different and unique in its own way because every person is unique in their own way. You never know where it's coming from or how it's going to manifest... or how somebody could actually do that. My oldest daughter and I read so many books right after my husband died trying to figure out why, why, why would this happen? He didn't take drugs, he rarely drank, we were financially stable so... why? I'm actually going to go take a course on suicide because now I'm at a point where I want to understand it better. I've read a lot of research about it, some research coming out of Harvard. It was just in the New York Times Magazine Sunday supplement talking about unexplained suicides could be traced to childhood abuse. So that sort of made some sense to me about my husband. I think he had a great deal of abuse when he was a child that he never really got over. So that sort of put something to bed in me. That made me a little bit calmer so that I could understand how somebody so successful, so smart, so popular, so untouched by addiction could possibly have this happen.

The day that it happened with Peter was a day like any other day. We were really busy. I was getting ready to shoot a commercial in two weeks -- an endorsement that I was doing. I also had my line of denim jeans and t-shirts that I was getting ready to launch so I was super, super busy. But our breakfast time was more like a dinnertime with other families because Peter worked crazy hours. He would go to work all day and he would go to studios at night to visit the different artists and the people that were making music and doing things... or movie sets, whatever he had going on. He would come home, maybe do homework with the girls and then run out again. So breakfast was our time where I'd make a big breakfast and we'd sit and talk about everything and have a lot of fun, even though it was hectic.

This particular morning, I was making breakfast, and I was racing around the kitchen like a crazy woman and he came and stood behind me at the stove, and he said, "Hey, aren't you forgetting something?" And I said, "No, I think I've got everything in line here." And he said, "Honey, you're forgetting something." And I said, "Oh my gosh, yes I am." So I dropped everything and I turned around and I went into his arms and wrapped myself around him and I gave him a big kiss, and we looked at each other in the eyes and I said, "I love you." We did that every single day that we were together if he wasn't traveling or out of town. We did that from the day we got married because we thought that was a powerful affirmation of our feelings and what was important. Right after I said I love you, I said, "Honey, can you drive the kids to school today because I'm never going to make my meetings." So, he said, "Sure, I'll drive them." And then as I was looking at him -- you know how you look at somebody that you love so much? He always looked good to me. He always looked good, period. I was watching his back as he left, and he kind of shrugged his shoulders and turned half way around.

And he wanted to say something to me but everything was so hectic so I assume he made the decision not to tell me and he kept walking down the hallway. I think he wanted to say something to me then, [but] we didn't have time to say. The girls went off with him, and when they got out of the car, he said, "Bye, I love you." They said, "Bye, dad," and that was it. We never saw him again.

You didn't see any signs of depression prior to that day?

I saw anxiety but a lot of people that have big careers, which he certainly had, have anxiety when they're making a big deal. He represented Michael Jackson, and you know how crazy that was. He's the man responsible for putting the "This Is It" tour together. He brought AEG into the picture which I'm sure now he wishes he didn't. So I think that he felt very responsible for what happened to Michael. And I think that that gave him a lot of grief. He had a lot of clients that he was making big deals for and I think that there was a certain anxiety that came about with that.

Did he shoot himself?

Yes, yes he did...

Did he come home from taking the girls to school?

Yes, but I didn't know where he was. I was calling for him after I got home because Fridays were our day to be together, hang out and maybe go for lunch before he went to the office. He'd go to the office around noon or 1 or 2 o'clock on Fridays.

So he was at home when he shot himself?

Yeah, we have a couple of acres at home behind gates. He walked to the top of the property, and that's where he was.

Did you hear the gunshot?

I heard the gunshot. I went running up the hill to see what the hell happened and then something in me said, "Hey, turn around, you have two children, you can't be going in the middle of any kind of violent situation. You're responsible for two little girls, what are you doing? You can take your life in your hands now."

Who found your husband?

One of the ladies that works at our home, I think. We called 911 and the police came over immediately. They swarmed our house.

What could have triggered your husband to shoot himself in your mind?

I think that there was pressure on my husband that caused him to do that. I think a lot of things that were going on in his life, and problems that were overwhelming to him.

How devastated were you?

We were so devastated. When you are part of a happy family unit, you lose part of that... I mean, we were completely insulated and happy with our family. Peter and I really knew what was important in life and I think we instilled that in our daughters. Their dad was everything to them, and that will always be a loss no matter what happens in our lives, no matter how great it is. It is always going to be bittersweet because our little circle of light and family was everything to us.

So how did you tell your daughters? They were so young, 11 and 14. That must have been the hardest conversation you ever had to have.

You know my house was overrun with reporters and the coroner's office and all sorts of people so I actually went down to some friends' home. It was actually their 20th wedding anniversary, and they had a big cake there, I'll never forget it. [Laura and Sophia's] nanny, who has continued to stay with us -- who was their nanny when they were little -- went to get them at school.

I was waiting for them at [my] friends' house. They thought the nanny was crying because maybe something had happened to one of their friends. I drove their dad's car over to [my friends'] home, so they said, "Oh, good, dad's here. Mom must be here too." When I told them [about] their dad, they... you can imagine what happened.

They must have fallen apart.

We all fell apart. I didn't fall apart [completely]. I didn't have that luxury of falling apart because I had to stay strong.

How did you deal with depression that first year?

It's sad. (Bach begins to tear up.) I'll tell you something. I was in a state of shock for a year. So that kind of helps with the pain, but you have to be careful because you're walking around in shock. Things aren't the same. Nothing's the same. (Pause) I wouldn't sleep for weeks at a time, maybe a couple of hours. And then, all of a sudden I would be picking up my daughters -- maybe from a party or something -- I'd realize that the engine would be going, I'd be waiting for them and I would be like a baby. You know when a baby gets in the car and they go to sleep. I would not be able to keep my eyes open. Things like that would happen. I'd forget to breathe. I would gasp for air sometimes.

And you have to carry the load because you have your two daughters.

The person that wants to keep their family intact, that's just a natural response. You have no other choice but to be strong. If your loved ones are strong and good... I realize that these girls are my legacy, they are Peter's legacy. They are a testament to our love and what we thought of family, and there's no way that I could ever slack off on that and just think about myself.

How long before your life was back to normal or is it ever back to normal?

Here's what happens. The first year it's all about just getting through the year. I had a lot of things happen that were surprising. The law firm is still open because of certain people wanting to settle situations in their favor so I'm dealing with that right now. I really feel like I should talk about all this in book form because I think people need to know how to protect themselves in a situation where you have a sudden death because none of us ever expect it. And I was the most prepared person. I like to think that Peter and I were the most prepared people ever because we took our responsibilities as parents so seriously and we wanted to make sure in case something would happen that we were all going to be okay.

How are your daughters, Laura and Sophia, doing now?

I think the girls are good. We've stayed very, very close to our priest. In fact, in the beginning year, he came over to dinner at least once a week to once a month. We stayed really on top of that. Oh my gosh, our friends surrounded us with love and wouldn't let me fall. It was like being in a pack. They just wouldn't let me fall. My friend Alma (Ben "Cooter" Jones' wife) came out here once a month for a year.

It's such a blessing to have close friends.

Yes! They went through so much with me. And [as time goes on], you're more awake. You hurt more. It's like having a bad accident. The first part, you're in shock, and then you have to do some very hard work on yourself to go on because you don't feel like moving after you've been in a situation like this. You don't feel like doing anything.

I worked for CBS for years doing Dukes of Hazzard, and they called immediately, saying, "If there's anything you need, we want to help you." That's the kind of people they were. They all knew Peter. Then this last year, they said, "Hey, what about going back to work?" And I did it. I just sort of said alright, let's go have a meeting and we created this character (Anita Lawson on The Young and the Restless) and it has been so much fun. It's a challenge. It's like getting back up and going.

You know, I've done three films this last year too. This wasn't my plan at all. Peter and I had plans and I was just following along with that; I thought my career was not behind me, but not the first thing I was thinking about because we both realized that one big career in a family is enough. The other person has to take care of the kids and keep the home fires burning, and that was sort of my position. I enjoyed every single minute of watching my girls walk, run and go to school.

What's your message to people who have had to deal with a sudden death?

I have to say that there's just certain things that people have to pay attention to and that's pray a lot, go to church a lot, get therapy, be with your friends, read about it and really, really take care of yourself. [For] people who have a friend who this happens to, I would just say, with any loss, it doesn't have to be suicide, just be there as a shoulder for that person to lean on. I can't tell you how many of my friends and my busy friends -- everybody's busy with their lives -- would drop everything when I called or were here bringing me something to eat or whatever, coming by. It's the most important thing.

What would you advise people to say or not to say to someone who has had to deal with a suicide in the family?

I think that you can say anything because I think that people understand that [their friends] are trying to connect with you and are trying to make you feel better or let you know that they love you just [by] being there. So I don't think there is a wrong thing to say. I think just the fact that somebody shows up and is there for you, means everything.

I also went to a grief group. People lost their husbands or their children to cancer or loved ones to heart attacks, to all sorts of things, but suicide is so overwhelming because people just don't do this! Not when they're part of a happy family. And I also think people should realize when they have children and they have a family, you don't belong to yourself anymore. You belong to that family unit, and you're not allowed to do this. You can't do this. You don't have that option anymore. It's just not right.

Follow Catherine Bach on Twitter: www.twitter.com/_CatherineBach

Need help? In the U.S., call 1-800-273-8255 for the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline.

Was Kourtney Kardashian jealous on the latest episode of "Keeping Up With the Kardashians"? Kanye West was in Paris working on his album, which left pregnant Kim home alone. And so Kourtney's baby daddy, Scott Disick, offered to help Kim with little things like putting her stroller together.

Kourtney argued that Scott wasn't there for her during her pregnancy, but now he was available for her sister? “I’m happy that you’re helping her--" Kourtney started, but Scott interrupted her. “No, I don’t think you are," he said.

“It’s definitely annoying that Scott is willing to go above and beyond for Kim when he never did for me," Kourtney admitted later in a confessional.

The couple did talk things out, and Scott admitted that he hadn't helped Kourtney enough. He pointed out that he knows more about babies now, though, so he can more easily help Kim. So was Kourtney being jealous, or did she have a point?

Several mediaoutlets described her behavior as "jealous," but not all of them. Hollywood Life ran a poll and their readers seemed to agree with Kourtney. 70 percent didn't think she was overreacting at all to Scott's actions in regards to Kim's pregnancy.

See more family drama every Sunday on "Keeping Up With the Kardashians," Sundays at 9 p.m. ET on E!

TV Replay scours the vast television landscape to find the most interesting, amusing, and, on a good day, amazing moments, and delivers them right to your browser.

What was supposed to be a weekend celebration of the musical TV series "Glee" turned into an impromptu memorial of song and dance for Cory

Monteith after news of the "Glee" co-star's death rocked a "Glee" fan convention in England.

The hundreds of "gleeks," as they're known – joined a chorus of thousands worldwide who took to social media with similar expressions about Monteith's passing. The actor's struggles with addiction echoed those of other young stars whose premature deaths also left young fans grieving.

"The whole day was simultaneously the best and worst experience of my life," said Chloe Harvey, an 18-year-old fan from Portsmouth, England. "The news was devastating. No one had any idea what to say or do. It just shows how much of a truly amazing guy Cory was that everyone was so shocked and emotional about the news. Everyone was crying and sharing their stories."

Monteith, 31, was found dead in his Vancouver, British Columbia, hotel room on Saturday, according to police, who said an autopsy is expected Monday to determine the cause of death.

Police said Monteith had been out with people earlier, but video and electronic records from the hotel indicated he returned to his room by himself early Saturday morning. He was believed to be alone when he died.

The Fox network and the producers of "Glee," including 20th Century Fox Television, called Monteith an exceptional performer "and an even more exceptional person." They said he was "a true joy to work with and we will all miss him tremendously." Lea Michele, Monteith's "Glee" co-star and real-life girlfriend, asked for privacy upon hearing the news of his death.

While it's not known what caused his death, Monteith's passing recalls the lives of Heath Ledger, Corey Haim and River Phoenix – actors who battled substance abuse and died in their 20s and 30s. Monteith talked bluntly about struggling with addiction since he was a teenager, calling it a serious problem and telling Parade magazine in 2011 he was "lucky to be alive."

Monteith admitted himself to a treatment facility in April for substance addiction and asked for privacy as he took steps toward recovery, a representative said at the time. Michele told People magazine that she loved and supported him and was proud he was seeking help. It was not Monteith's first time in rehab. He also received treatment when he was 19.

"I think kids really need a place to go and feel like they belong," he said in the video posted the site for Project Limelight, a Vancouver charity offering theater and arts programs to at-risk youth. "When I was a kid, I struggled a lot with who I was and where my life was going and what I was interested in. And I was fortunate to have the arts inspire me."

Monteith similarly moved fans. At the weekend "Glee" convention, instead of planned revelry like singing competitions and autograph sessions with actors who've played members of the rival Warblers glee club, organizers Starfury Conventions rescheduled the final day of the three-day event at Heathrow's Thistle Hotel so the 250 attendees could mourn him together.

"We all woke up to hear the story, and no one really wanted to believe it was true," said Chloe-Louise Bond, a 22-year-old fan from Wakefield, England. "Walking into the main room, you could just feel the tragedy in the air, absolute strangers became a family right in that moment. Everyone was crying and hugging and just trying to get over the shock."

It was a day filled with sadness and songs. The attendees chanted "Cory! Cory! Cory!" In unison, they sang tunes like "Don't Stop Believin'," the Journey cover crooned by Monteith in the high school-set musical's first episode. Curt Mega, Telly Leung and other actors who've played Warblers led a group discussion with fans about their memories of Monteith.

"Glee," with its catchy song-and-dance numbers and high-profile guest stars like Gwyneth Paltrow and Britney Spears, became an instant hit when it debuted in 2009 and made celebrities of Montieth and the rest of the relatively unknown cast. Over the past four seasons, he delivered renditions of such classics as U2's "One" and R.E.M.'s "Losing My Religion."

Monteith served as the show's resident hunk with a heart of gold. He played Finn Hudson, a football quarterback with two left feet who found more camaraderie in the choir room than on the football field. After his character graduated high school, Hudson sought out to find himself before settling on what he wanted to do with his life: become a teacher and mentor.

Outside the Vancouver hotel where Monteith's body was discovered, a makeshift memorial popped up where fans left flowers and notes commemorating the actor. (hash)RipCoryMonteith and (hash)StayStrongLea became trending topics on Twitter.

___

AP writers Jeremy Hainsworth in Vancouver, Lynn Elber in Los Angeles, and Charles J. Gans and Frazier Moore in New York contributed to this report.

___

Follow AP Entertainment Writer Derrik J. Lang on Twitter at . http://www.twitter.com/derrikjlang

After a controversial twitter reaction to the ‘Not Guilty’ verdict given to George Zimmerman on Saturday, New York Giants wide reciever Victor Cruz has begun the week doing damage control.

On Monday, Cruz called into ESPN Radio’s “Mike and Mike” show and “The Dan Patrick Show” to publicly apologize for a tweet he sent and promptly deleted after realizing it sent the wrong message to his followers.

After learning that Zimmerman had been cleared of all charges for the shooting of 17-year-old Trayvon Martin, the 26-year-old NFL star tweeted out his initial reaction.

“Thoroughly confused. Zimmerman doesn’t last a year before the hood catches up to him,” Cruz’s now deleted tweet read according to several outlets.

During the call with Dan Patrick, the wide receiver tried to contextualize the tweet before apologizing:

“In the moment, when it happened – I’m not going to lie, I was a little angry. As a father, you think about if that was your son, if that was your kid… I put out the tweet as a reaction to what I was seeing on Twitter, to what my friends and family were writing on Twitter.”

While speaking on the “Mike and Mike” show, the football star admitted once again that what he had done was “wrong” because of the type of behavior it could encourage.

"I took it back because I understand how things can be taken," Cruz said on the ESPN radio show. "There are a lot of children that follow me, a lot of kids that follow me, and I don't want them to think I'm trying to incite violence on anyone. That's not what I'm here for. That's not what my intent was -- or is -- at all."

In the conversation, Cruz referenced his childhood in Paterson, N.J. where there was “violence happening all around me” to emphasize the reasons he didn’t want to promote that type of behavior.

Before turning to the media to offer a public apology, the Giants wide reciever took to Twitter to try and undo the damage of his initial reaction.

My tweet last night was my initial interpretation of the reaction I was reading on twitter.I immediately realized my tweet was a mistake and

— Victor Cruz (@TeamVic) July 14, 2013

I apologize, that's why I deleted it. I believe conversation not confrontation leads to change and progress. I never have and never will

— Victor Cruz (@TeamVic) July 14, 2013

advocate violence under any circumstances and I pray that we all encourage and educate each other. The death of Trayvon Martin is an

— Victor Cruz (@TeamVic) July 14, 2013

unthinkable tragedy that is any parent's worst nightmare. As a father, I want my daughter to grow up in a country that uses this tragedy to

— Victor Cruz (@TeamVic) July 14, 2013

heal and grow and progress. My prayers continue to go out to Trayvon Martin's family.

— Victor Cruz (@TeamVic) July 14, 2013

The first trailer for "12 Years A Slave," the star-studded new film from director Steve McQueen, has been released by Fox Searchlight.

"12 Years A Slave" is based on the true story of Solomon Northup, a New York resident who was kidnapped and sold into slavery in 1841. He was rescued 12 years later.

Beloved British actor Chiwetel Ejiofor stars in the film as Northup, leading an incredible cast that includes Michael Fassbender, Paul Giamatti, Benedict Cumberbatch, Paul Dano, Michael K. Williams, Quvenzhane Wallis, Alfre Woodard, Scoot McNairy, Taran Killam and Brad Pitt. John Ridley ("Red Tails," the story for "Three Kings") wrote the script. Based on the first trailer, expect Ejiofor to find himself in the middle of Oscar conversations from now until 2014.

Watch the first "12 Years A Slave" trailer above. The film is set for release on Oct. 18.

On Monday's episode of "Larry King Now," Jane Lynch opened up about why she and Lara Embry, her wife of three years, are divorcing.

"It's two people who decided it's better to go apart than stay together," she told Larry King.

Lynch filed for divorce on Friday, one month after announcing that she and Embry had parted ways. The estranged couple met at a fundraiser in 2009 and married on Memorial Day in 2010 in Massachusetts.

The "Glee" star told King that she and Embry remain friends and that Haden, Embry's daughter from a previous relationship who is "very dear" to Lynch, is doing great. Yet, she acknowledged that divorce is hard.

"We have to remain adults, which we have," Lynch said. "We keep everybody -- especially Haden's -- good in our mind."

Watch the clip above to hear more from Lynch on her divorce (and check out the full episode here), then click through the slideshow below for other celebrity divorces that surprised us.

Keep in touch! Check out HuffPost Divorce on Facebook and Twitter.

Well... most of you read the book so that means you're familiar with Rich by now. I just landed in the States and he was my first call. I was listening to MSNBC on the radio, so this is the first time I'm getting real-time reaction/news from an American source about the Martin case. I'm trying not to internalize this feeling and make it about me -- but hey, it is what it is, maybe I'm melodramatic -- but all I'm consumed with is my positioning in life.

All the time I tell these cute self-depreciating celeb run-ins when I get a pie-in-the-face moment. But rarely do I share stories of a more serious nature pie-in-the-face moments. All I could keep saying was, "Thank god for my good fortune." I can't tell you how many times a year I'm in a serious situation only to hear the magic words, "Oh... wait... Questlove? Hey, guys, it's Questlove -- we're so sorry, you can go." Mostly because in the age of social media most people are quick to dismiss my tales as ‪#‎FirstWorldProblems unless it's super major. (Did I ever FB the story of how the Buffalo DEA held me 'cause they thought I was a drug lord back in 2006? Multiply that scenario by a realistic 40 -- like five to seven times a year a night ending in the words "thank god for that afro, we'd never have recognized you" happens to me.)

So a friend of mine sent me this apology letter. All the time I'm in scenarios in which primitive, exotic-looking me (6'2", 300 pounds, uncivilized afro for starters) finds himself in places that people that look like me aren't normally found. I mean, what can I do? I have to be somewhere on Earth, correct? In the beginning (let's say 2002 when the gates of "Hey, Ahmir, would you like to come to [name swanky elitist place]?" opened), initially I'd say "no" -- mostly because it's been hammered in my DNA to not "rock the boat" -- which, since I wanna keep it real, means not make "certain people" feel uncomfortable.

I mean, that is a crazy way to live.

Seriously, imagine a life in which you think of other people's safety and comfort first before your own. You're kinda programmed and taught that from the gate. It's like the opposite of entitlement.

Problem is, I do have desires to go to certain places and do certain things and enjoy the perks and benefits of a person who works his arse off as much as I do. So I got over my hangups of not wanting to be the odd guy in the room sometime around 2007.

Mixed results at best. Some of it is "oh, that wasn't that bad," some of it was "well... that was awkward." (This is the prime reason I hate vacations. Those who know me well always ask why I never take them. Main reason? I don't feel like being the "odd guy out" at vacation spots --hence that hobo journey of 2009 train trip I took was the best one I ever took. No scaring people on a train ride.)

Anywho, Imma share a portion of the letter. I was explaining to a friend something I found troubling but managed to find humor in. My friends know that I hate parking lots and elevators, not because they are places that danger could occur, but they're prime places in which someone of my physical size can be seen as a danger element. I wait and wait in cars until I feel it's safe for me to make people feel safe. I know most of y'all are eye-rolling, but if you spent a good three months in these size 14s you'd understand why I take that position.

So here is setup.

I live in a "nice building." I work hard. You know I work hard. My logic is (naive alert in 5...4....3...2...): "Well, there cant be any fear of any type in this building, you first of all gotta go through hell and high water just to get accepted to live here like it's Dartmouth or U Penn. Secondly there's like five to eight guards on duty 24/7 so this spot is beyond safe. Like Oscar winners and kids of royalty and sports guys and mafia goombahs live here." So one night I get in elevator and just as the door closes this beautiful woman gets on. Because of a pain in the arse FOB card device you have to use to get to your floor, it just makes it an easier protocol for whoever is pressing floors to take everyone's request like you are at the window of a drive-thru ("What floor?" "54.....82.......43......76......"). So I press my floor number and I ask her, "What floor, ma'am?" (Yes, I say ma'am because... *sigh* anyway...) She says nothing. Stands in the corner. Mind you, I just discovered the Candy Crush app so if anything, I'm the rude one cause I'm more obsessed with winning this particular board than anything else. Plus in my head: "No way I can be a threat to a woman this fine if I'm buried deep in this game -- so surely she feels safe."

So the humor comes in that I thought she was on my floor cause she never acknowledged my floor request. She was also bangin' so inside I was like, "dayuuuuuuuuuuum she lives on my floor? *bow chicka wowowowowwoooowwww!!!" Like I was kinda happy cause as far as I knew, only six people occupied the nine spots on my floor. So instantly I was on some "what dessert am I welcoming committee-ing her with?!" Anywho, the door opens and I waited to let her off first cause I am a gentleman (old me woulda rushed first, thus not putting me in the position to have to follow her, god forbid, if she too makes a left.) (Always in this position in dark hotel hallways -- Sandra Bernhard will deny this til the cows come home but she was scared out of her mind the first night we accidentally met in a hotel in which I had the misfortune to be on same floor and having to follow her all the way down the worlds darkest art deco hallway to our rooms -- we joked about it years later but it was tense.) So door opens and I flirt, "Ladies first." She says, "This is not my floor." So then I assume she is FOB-less (food delivery people often get wrong floors and we press them to right floors), so I pulled my card out, assuming she didn't live in the building, to press her floor yet again. She offers, "That's okay."

Then it hit me: "Oh God, she purposely held that information back."

The door closed but it was a "pie-in-the-face" moment.

I laughed at it.

Sorta...

Well, inside I cried, but it's like, if I cried at every insensitive act that goes on in the name of safety as far as I'm concerned, I'd have to be committed to a psych ward. So I just taught myself throughout the years to just accept it and maybe even see it as funny. Each second that went by, it kept eating at me ("Well I guess she never watched the show."... "My English was super clear. I called her 'ma'am' like I was Webster"... "Well, those that know you know that you're cool, but you definitely know that you are a walking rape nightmare, right, Ahmir? Of course she was justified in not saying her floor -- that was her prerogative!"... "You are kinda scary looking, I guess?"). I mean, it's a bajillion thoughts -- all of them self-depreciating voices slowly eating my soul away.

So I told the friend the story about how I think I scared the lady in my above-secure building elevator so much that she wanted to wait until I left before she felt it safe enough to press her floor number.

This is the response/email apology I got today:

"I am wrong about many things, but I want to apologize for taking a particular story you told me too lightly.

............you told me that a few days prior a woman had joined you in an elevator and on the way up to your floor you asked her what floor she was going to. she said nothing, so you just assumed she was going to your floor. When you arrived at your floor, she didn't get off.

I told you I didn't care much about race anymore and I meant it....."

That was gist of the letter (I edited stuff out).

In short she gave me the dismissive/"cry me a river" response most people default to -- which of course just translates and filters to, "Oh... my feelings don't count."

Because... my feelings don't... count.

I don't know why it's that way. Mostly I came to the conclusion that people over 6 feet and over weight regulation or as dark as me (or in my tax bracket) simply don't have feelings.

Or it's assumed we don't have feelings.

I mean, it's partially right. I literally figured the only way for me to not go insane in a career that creates junkies (or at best Kanye) is to desensitize myself from feelings.

Thing is, though, I'm a halfway crook.

An awesome poker player. So yeah, I hurt.

But I'll be damned if I let you know that.

So call me a 75 percent robot/25 percent human being. (This should also explain to you why I'm able to work mammoth hours with zero complaints.)

So when I got off the plane this morning and I was waiting in customs, I read that apology note...

And it kinda touched me. Like that vindication moment when the misunderstood character on TV finally proves they are not crazy and people see it their way finally. She related to me, and it was a gut punch I wasn't expecting in an already emotional day. So... I guess I started to almost... cry?

So then Rich hits me on the phone seconds later:

BOOM

Cut off.

I know it's sad to say, but we in The Roots circle love each other like family -- but not enough to trust each other in vulnerable moments. I mean this is a man who waited until he was on the operating table minutes away from surgery to finally reveal to me he was going through a life or death cancer procedure simply because he didn't wanna distract me or create excuses as to why I didn't finish my book (the majority of the back-and-forth banter talk from Mo Meta was done with him in a hospital without my knowledge -- that's how deep "feelings" are buried in this circle).

So I'm doing my best "straighten up, stop sobbing" schtick and he says, "What's wrong?" Four seconds flat -- I bury it and I'm back to normal.

I'm not proud of that.

I spent 11 of the last 20 years in therapy trying to deal with that.

So I decided to abandon operation "bury," and I said, "Well..."

Rich: "What's wrong?"

I mean, how do I answer that? This does not feel like an average day: Remember how nice everyone was post-9/11? Eerie. Almost surreal.

Like everyone is acting "too nice" and I dunno how to process that. Then there are people that are acting like nothing happened ("Hey, Quest, where is Dave Chappelle at?!!??!"). It's just one of those days that doesn't feel normal to me.

So Rich keeps picking at the question like a 3-month-old scab from camping: WHAT'S WRONG?

And I'm like, "Need I say it?!?!"

But it's like I can't tell if he's provoking me or not. Half the time I'm thinking he's waiting for me to complain about last night's show in Amsterdam. Then I'm like, "Am I embarrassed to tell Rich I feel horrible in general?" I don't know how to not internalize the overall message this whole Trayvon case has taught me:

You ain't shit.

That's the lesson I take from this case.

You ain't shit.

Those words are deep 'cause these are words I heard my whole life.

I heard from adults in my childhood that I need to be "about something" other than all that banging and clanging and music I play all the time. And as I got older I heard I wasn't as good as "so and so and so and so" is at music. I mean, the "you a'int shit" stories I got -- Jesus, it's a wonder I made it.

So, Rich asks, "Wait... you're not surprised, are you?"

I wasn't surprised at all, but that doesn't mean it doesn't sting any less.

I mean, I should be angry, right? I remember when Sean Bell's outcome came out and I just knew "oh God, New York is gonna go up in flames." And like... no one was fuming. It was like, "No surprises here... that's life."

So Rich asks: "Like, are you surprised... that you ain't shit?"

I mean, it hurts to hear it and I said, "I'm not surprised at the disposition but who wants to be reminded? What fat person wants to hear they aren't pleasing to the eye? Or what addict wants to hear they are a constant eff-up? Who wants to be reminded that *shrug* it's just the way it is?"

So I guess I'm struggling to get at least 1 percent of this feeling back from all this protective numbness I've built around me to keep me from feeling because at the end of the day... I'm still human...

...right?

I was pleased to read a front page article in the New York Times about my friend Rabbi David Wolpe. He recently made the morally courageous decision to officiate at the marriages of gay couples now that same-sex marriages is the law of California.

Last year, Newsweek named him the most influential rabbi in America. I know David well. We have discussed many subjects but we never touched on same sex marriages. Many in the congregation criticized him. They don't realize that to be against same-sex marriage is to be against love.

I asked him, "How did the young people react? How did your 16-year-old daughter Samara react?" The rabbi laughed, "She said, 'Dad, what took you so long?'"

Out of the mouths of babes.

Young people listen to the love songs that declare a love higher than the sky and deeper than the ocean. But they often confuse love with the sexual urges that now overwhelm them. As life goes on they will be saddened as those urges dwindle. Sex may fade, but love... love lasts. They don't realize that the most important element of love will be waiting for them. Romance. Beautiful romance. This is how I express it to my wife:

Romance Begins at 80
And I ought to know.
I live with a girl
Who will tell you so.

I sit by her bath
As she soaks in the tub.
Then help her out
For a strong towel rub.

She likes that a lot
But before I tire.
It's time to pour the wine
And start lighting the fire.

As the fire crackles,
We talk of the past
We met over 50 years ago
Did you think it would last?

The glasses are empty
The ashes are red
Thanks for a lovely evening
But it's time for bed.

When you get to 90
Cherish the memories you had
Those are the only things
That can make you feel glad.

"Grow old along with me, the best is yet to be." -Browning

"Real Housewives of Orange County" star Vicki Gunvalson stopped by HuffPost Live on Monday and dished on her divorce, which played out on the Bravo reality show.

Gunvalson, who filed for divorce from husband Donn Gunvalson in 2010, admitted that she feels remorseful about the relationship's demise.

"I have a lot of divorce remorse. I mean I really, really do." she said. "In hindsight I wish I would have worked harder on the marriage. I think I messed up on some areas and he messed up too. It takes two people to get married, it takes two people to get divorced."

Gunvalson also elaborated on the reason the pair split, and admitted that she still cares about her ex.

"It stinks to get divorced, especially when you still have feelings for that person. I will always love Donn, I met him when I was 21 and got married when I was 32; I've known him my whole adult life," she said. "He's a great man, we just drifted apart and couldn't figure out a way to get back together."

Watch the clip above to hear more on Gunvalson's split (and check out the full segment here), then click through the slideshow below for other 'Real Housewife' divorcees.

Keep in touch! Check out HuffPost Divorce on Facebook and Twitter.